The Punter Becomes The Punted |  Um, What?!?

Whenever I receive an e-mail my computer emits a happy little ding.

Ding! "Hey, thanks for the link — I really needed a pick-me-up!"

Ding! "Here's my flight information. Do you think the town can survive both of us? We are here for your pleasure, ladies, and leave us a clear shot at the bar!"

Ding! "Great news!!!!! You can now buy V1.ag.r.a and c.1A.lis directly from us at 50% 0ff — without a prescript10n!!!!!!!!! jupiter cattleprod deionized pulchritudinous defenestration"

and then

Ding! "How can we resolve your issue drive you into a panic with a single e-mail!"


From: Despair Inc.
Subject: order demotivators-187495 from Despair Inc.
Date: 6 May 2004 17:22:34
To: Brian Moore

Again, thanks for your recent order from Despair, Inc.

If you have received this email, it means that your credit
card information proved valid and that your order has been
sent. You might assume now that we have your money that
you're in for better treatment. You might also assume
that if you try really hard, you will succeed. But your
assumptions would, in both cases, be completely wrong.
And that is why you REALLY need our products.
.
.
.
As always, if you have questions, please contact us at
"unfulfilled@despair.com". We'll do our best to solve the
problem, since, you know, we already have your money.

Automatically yours,
E.L.

E.L.Kersten, Ph.D.
Founder & COO,
Despair, Inc.



The following items have been shipped:
NameCodeQtyEach
----------------------------------------------------------------
2003 Notecard CollectionNS-004112.95
Burnout DesktopperNF-014112.95
"Classic"FWN-001130.00
Subtotal25.90
Shipping6.95
Tax2.71
Total35.56

This completes your order. Thank you for shopping with us.



The Punter Becomes The Punted |  Um, What?!?